The Wedding Dress

Hey guys, so, I have a couple of WIPs, for those who doesn’t know what that means, it’s Work In Progress… I’m writing a couple of books and one of them is called The Wedding Dress. I’m not sure if that will be the name I will keep when I finish writing it. But, for now, that’s what I call it.

I’m having difficulty giving an end for it, so I have three of four endings in my head… I have not put any ending on the page yet. They are all in my head and they are safe there. Wink, wink!

So, while I’m struggling to finish the book, I have had some ideas for the cover and the most obvious you can guess. Hint… the title of this blog!

The other day I was looking for belly dance classes where I live and our friend Google showed me some places near where I live and I found Larissa! I started to look at her website, then her social media links from her website and I started to following her on Instagram. From there, scrolling down her photos to learn more about her, to see if I could feel her energy and I fell in love with her. You know what I mean. Her energy came through the screen of my computer and I sent her a message about the belly dance classes and also about her wedding dress. Why her wedding dress? Because while I was looking at her photos and what she wrote in them all I found out that in January she was giving away her wedding dress. My book cover came to my mind immediately so, although we are in July and I doubted she would still have that wedding dress and if she did, she could have changed her mind or perhaps had donated it. The dress was absolutely beautiful and she looked stunning on it.

When I sent her a message, I asked her for the prices, location where she taught belly dance and asked if by any chance she still had the dress. She replied that she was not teaching belly dance right now but she had the wedding dress still and if I wanted I could go to her house to try it. I could not believe, first of all, that she still have the dress, second, that she would invite a total stranger to her house to try on the dress! I didn’t tell you this guys… she is Brazilian!! Of all countries… she is from my country! When I tell you Brazilians are great people, I’m not kidding.

My mind went wild. My anniversary was approaching, August 2nd… and I had a wild idea of remarrying my husband… at the beach with a wedding dress! Yes, I’m married… I know… whatever! Call me crazy.

Anyways, I looked again at her pictures and I thought to myself, “there’s no way that dress can fit me.” Larissa looked very tall so the chances of her dress would fit me, didn’t seemed right. But I wanted to take pictures of the dress anyway… you know… for my book cover or inspiration to finish the book!

So, off I went to her house on Monday, this past Monday and I also wanted to know more about her and her courses. She teaches Thetahealing and Hypnosis and she is also a Doula. She is having a three day seminar on the first weekend of August of the Thelahealing! What are the odds, that I found her while I was looking for belly dance classes and instead, I found a wedding dress for my book cover (if that name remains when I finish writing the book), because, you know, sometimes… often… almost always, we writers change names… well, we change everything sometimes… we write and rewrite all the time the plot, the chapter, the paragraph, so the title would not be immune to that “law”.

Guys, I tried the dress in her house and you are not going to believe this… I could not believe it myself. It fit perfectly!! And although the purpose of me having it borrowed or something, the wild idea that I could be remarried on it is very tempting but… I believe everything happens for a reason. I’m so into energy, healing, helping others heal, etc. Who knows, next time you hear from me I’ll probably be a Thetahealing Teacher… until then, I totally recommend Lari. Yes, I call her Lari… short for Larissa… because that’s how we Brazilians are… we call someone we just met by nicknames! Well, maybe that’s just me.

f you want to know more about her work, check out her website and follow her on social media. She is beautiful inside and out.

I’m so happy guys… I received an email yesterday from someone who is reading my book, The American Dream and Everything in Between, and he told me that he is really liking it and it warmed my heart… also this week, my book received another review on Amazon saying it should be translate to Portuguese and Spanish! Whaaa? I love it… I love that people reach out about my book and the things I do. I really hope my experience will help and inspire someone like me, an immigrant, trying to find their way when they move to another country. Last weekend my book sold 12 copies! So, yeah, I’m kind of over the moon this week!

Guys, let me know what you think about the dress! Isn’t it gorgeous?

That’s all for now guys… Stay safe and be well.

Isabel Canzoneri

Look at me, at Larissa’s office! I’m wearing her wedding dress! And check out all her certifications on the wall guys!! She is amazing!
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What Changed?

Sitting near a cliff by the ocean with luscious grass beneath her, Clara can smell the earth and the grass. The fresh air caressing her hair and kissing her face is refreshing and brings her a calm smile with a sense of peace that she has been longing for a long time. The sun warms her already heated body as it is involved by tanned strong arms that hold her tight, sitting behind her. As he removes a stash of hair from her face and kiss her gently on the top of her head, she closes her eyes and smiles again. Her heart filled with love. What changed?

She feels secure and loved when she is with this incredible man. Is he an angel? Did she die? She thinks she is living on a dream. What changed?

Her feelings betray her as she have flashbacks of herself, unhappy. Craving for hugs and for love. She bring herself back to the present moment. That’s where she must live now. What changed?

A tear rolls down her face with each image that appears in front of her. Is she dreaming or having a nightmare? She blinks and comes back to the present moment. What changed?

As she turns, she faces the man next to her. He is so handsome and he has his back to her now… in bed… and she feels all lonely again, as she’s always done, for the past twenty years of her marriage. What changed?

She gets up and go about her day, as she always does and she looks forward to the night to come so she can scape to her dreams.

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Bruises, Wounds, Resilience and Humiliation

Every day, everywhere in the world a woman, a child and even a man, suffer an abuse of some sort. The abuser is usually someone the abused is familiar with, more often than not, a member of the family.

The psychological effect inflicted in the person abused is vast and can last forever. When a child suffers the abuse, he or she, specially if they suffered or witnessed the abuse throughout their childhood are likely to grow up thinking it is a normal thing to do and will go through life accepting being constantly abused in adulthood and ultimately become an abuser as well.

Bruises disappear in a few days but the scars, visible or invisible, will be there for life, to whisper in their ears, from time to time or every day that they deserved. Some will fight that thought and might succeed. Some, however, will live with depression, anxiety and fear.

Resilience is part of the life of a survivor and so are bruises, wounds, humiliation and all the psychological effects.

Help is always available with various free resources for domestic violence victims. Don’t be ashamed of opening up to a professional. They will help you to heal! The road to recovery may be bumpy, but you will get there. Trust yourself!

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July Is Here! Move your body!

Hey guys! How are you doing? How are you feeling?

I’m asking these questions because sometimes we are on a go, go, go mode and our bodies feel it and send us signs! Pay attention to what your body is telling you!

Last month – sound’s strange writing about last month, when last month was two days ago! – I wrote a blog, and I talked a bit about an amazing gig I booked and I mentioned supplements I started taking a while ago but that is not what I’m going to talk to you about. No, I’m not going to talk about supplements again. But I’ll talk about the things that affect our bodies.

In the blog, I told you about the different hours I was working every day. Each day the call time changed and my body started to feel it. It was all confused with me going to bed super later, as I use to go to bed early, like 8 or 8:30 pm… sometimes even earlier. Don’t judge me! Or waking up super early, like 3:30 or 4 am. My body was like, “What are you doing woman?” “Can you make up your mind?” “I’m going to shut you down if you don’t listen to me.”

My last day of work was June 27th and I’m missing everyone and everything but my body was tired and needed some rest. a couple of days prior to wrap time, I felt my lower lips tingling and I knew a cold sore would break so I immediately applied alcohol because I didn’t know where my medication for that was, and I knew that was a sign of stress or tiredness. That alcohol helped so the cold sore was not big and soon I found my medication and applied it to my lips and it was not too bad. In fact it was rarely noticeable! Thank goodness!

After June 27th I was feeling really tired and the last couple of days, I’ve been feeling nauseated with absolutely no energy and couldn’t eat much. Good part of this is that I lost some pounds that I had gained, thanks to hormonal unbalance and my little pouch is gone. What I want to say is that our bodies will shut us down if we don’t find time to rest and nourish it! We must hydrate and eat health foods. We need to sleep and we need to relax.

Funny story, on Thursday I was cleaning the house, well, okay, I was vacuuming the house, and when I lowered my body to reach the outlet to unplug, as I had finished the task I gave me, I had a terrible pain on my lower back. I had to hold my back to be able to stand up straight. From that point forward I just couldn’t sit or stand up without pain. It was terrible, and when I tell my family I don’t like to clean the house, there’s a reason for that. It’s not good for you, so… don’t judge me!

I had been asking my husband to schedule an appointment with the chiropractor since I started working on June 1st and he kept forgetting so that day he had an appointment for himself and took me, because I was in bad shape, giving his time slot so David could fix me… and he did, as always!

Today I was feeling much better and I went for a hiking with a friend and we haven’t been in that trail since I injured my knee skiing in January. I wrote about my ski accident when it happened… you can read about it here. I was a bit concerned about my knee but I’m very happy as it didn’t hurt. I was only walking on flat surface per PT recommendation. When I got home, I was able to eat well and I also gave both my knees some love with self massages.

Last night I received an email from my Agent, saying that I booked a gig… one that I submitted on June 11th, while I was on the way to a wedding in Tehachapi! I literally took the picture in the car, when I submitted. I was not even thinking about it as it’s been a while, and it was a pleasant surprise and a very good feeling. And my body is healthy ready for it and so am I!

To end this post, I would like to wish you a wonderful holiday weekend and happy 4th if you are in the US. Stay safe and enjoy yourselves and your families.

Happy July!

Trail we were at today!
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Why The Nativity?

Hi guys, hope you are having a great weekend!

In my last blog I talked about cats, my cats to be more specific, i made a hyperlink if you want to check it out.

This month has ben an incredible month for me. I was cast as an Stand In in a feature film called Why The Nativity? and I’m incredibly grateful. Grateful for the person who thought of me and recommended me. I’m grateful for the Casting Director who submitted me to the Producers and Director. I’m grateful for the Director and Producers who picked me for the project and I’m grateful for all the cast and crew who have been working tirelessly putting their soul to this beautiful project. I’ve never been on a set that every single person I met was very kind and respectful. It’s an incredible feeling!

The production is wrapping this week and I’m going to miss being with them dearly. My last day is on Monday. Being able to contribute to them with my talent, makes me really happy. Talent that I was given to me when I was born and I’ve been able to express it by collaborating with other people in their projects. Projects that they envisioned and trusted they could do it. But you know we can’t do things alone. We need other people who have their own talents and that’s how we make things happen… by collaborating with others! Sharing and exchanging our talents.

We all have talents, even if we don’t see them and we must believe in ourselves. We are all capable of doing great things when we put the effort and time. We must recognize that we have strengths and weakness and we must focus on our strengths to be able to grow. Our weakness can become better if we work on them and transform them. We learn and we grow.

It’s been a busy month with crazy schedule for me. If you know me or follow me on social media, you know I go to bed early every day… This project though, I’ve been working all kinds of hours, from 5 am to 5 pm, or to noon to 9 pm, or from 3 pm to 1 am, or 4 pm to almost 2 am… you get the picture. So I don’t even know who I am when I wake up every morning. This is absolutely not a complaint. I love what I do as an actress and writer and being on set is like being in my element, being in a vortex, in alignment with all that I wish. It’s incredible!

These kind of schedule though can take a toll on you if you don’t have a good immune system. I started taking supplements not long ago. I confess, I’m bad at taking medication so it took me a little while to convince my stubborn self to take supplements, that supplements help you, help your body to recover faster. A few years ago, my doctor convinced me to take Vitamin D because mine was low so I started to take it and guess what? My Vitamin D level increase a lot and my doctor is super happy with it and so is my body. So supplements work and my body is proof of that. A while back, a good friend of mine talked to me about turmeric and swore by it so I looked into it when I was buying my Vitamin D supply and I bought this Turmeric Curcumin with black peper extract. It’s an anti-inflammatory and it is helping with my knee. I had an ski accident in January this year and my knee is troubling a bit still and I know that it is helping.

About two weeks ago, the condominium I manage had a fire in the patio of one of the units, due to electric issue. Tenants were using extension cords everywhere, lots of them, including inside the house. Guys, please, do not do that. It’s a safety issue and you have no idea how dangerous that is. You can ask any electrician or ask the fire department or check their website. You will put not only you and your house in danger, but your neighbors and perhaps an entire community. Prevention is key! If in doubt, ask a professional. Anyways, that added a lot of stress in my body. With my work schedule and the amount of work I had to do regarding the fire, when I got home from work was brutal so I started to looking into stress relief supplement and found Ashwagandha Root Herbal Supplement and I bought it. It is from the same brand of the Tumeric, I thought, “well, if the turmeric is good, I will try this one as well”, so I bought it and there’s no doubt in my mind it will be helping me for stress relief.

Take care of your body my friends. It’s the only one you have, so nurture it. Exercise! You don’t need to go to the gym… go for a walk, exercise in the comfort of your home, there are plenty of YouTube videos with great instructors, grab a bike and stroll on your neighborhood, walk at the beach, a park… Give your body good food and nutrition, eat lots of vegetables and fruits, avoid fast food and red meat… if possible, all meat… or at least eat very little of that, if you can’t really give that up, and drink lots of water. Rest!

Wishing you a wonderful weekend!


Bel Canzoneri

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Cats Are So Interesting!

When I was a kid we had many cats. Living on a farm we had all kinds of animals around and I guess they were more like street cats, I don’t remember because my family moved to another city when I was only eight years old. I don’t even know if my family worried about the cats or other animals we had when they decided to move out to the “big city” in search for a better life. Now that I’m thinking about it, I’ll have to ask my siblings who were older than me, although I doubt they will remember. It’s been so long.

I have two cats now and I absolutely love them both. I became a cat lady and cat mom, who takes pictures of my kitties all the time and the other day I was watching videos of cats on the internet and I read pretty much everything about cats and there’s this website that I found that has all kinds of good stuff it and guess what? I found out that both of my kitties names are in one or two lists of most popular cat names! What?? I found that so cool.

One of my cat is thirteen years old, Izzy and Katie is 3. She is pretty knew in the house so they are still separated… you know, in the process of introduction. Izzy has to accept Katie before they can be left alone together, so each has a separate bedroom and during the day we switch them around the house. One stays on one side of the house (office, our bedroom, bathroom) and the other has the other part (second bedroom, living room and kitchen/dining area). When Izzy goes to sleep in her day bed aka second bedroom, we close her door and open the door of our bedroom so Katie can roam around… At night Katie sleeps in the office, a place she chose when we brought her home, and Izzy sleeps with us. We switch their blankets and brush them with the same brush so eventually they will have the same smell and will be easier for them to accept each other or at least tolerate each other, and this in the case for Izzy because she has been living in the house for thirteen years now. She is so sweet and wants to be friends with Izzy but Izzy is not having it. At night we play with both, Katie in the office, which is adjacent to our bedroom and Izzy in the bed… Katie sits there looking at Izzy and Izzy still hisses a bit but way less than before.

It’s a long process and they say it takes at least six months and so far Katie has been with us only for a month and a half so we still have work to do with them. But we certainly see the progress made so far.

What’s your cat’s name? Want to know if yours is on the list too? Check out their site here!

Hope you are having a wonderful day. Keep your pets safe and give them some love.

Talk to you soon! Cheers guys…

Meet Izzy / Kitty / White Socks / Princess / Baby Girl… we call her all these names but Izzy (she is Izzy only at the Vet). She is 13 years old!
And this is Katie… her name from shelter was Gemini / well I call her Katie or Precious. She is 3 years old!
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Beach, Bikinis and Burkinis

Today I was walking at the beach with my friend and I notice this girl walking at the beach with socks on and I thought it was very cleaver! I told my friend I had to take a picture to put in my blog but she had passed us and for some reason I didn’t take the picture. Will do the same next time I go, although I do like to walk bare feet in the water to suck up the energy from our Mother Earth! Many times I walk in my front and backyard barefoot and I love it.

Anyways, it got me thinking as I watched beach goers walk by or just seat at the sand, socking up the sun watching the waves coming and going. Wait, what sun? It was not out today, and it was a little cool so many people were wearing long sleeve t-shirt and sweatpants. For some reason Lyra came to my mind. Perhaps because I’m from Brazil and the beaches there are so crowded in comparison to the beaches here in the States, even in the most crowded days and the bikinis are very minimalist there. No, I don’t think that was the reason. Truth be told, the swimsuit from LYRA is simply gorgeous! Very beautiful and elegant pieces. I’ll have some pictures below. I’m sure you will agree with me. I would love to have some of the pieces and the pictures I got from their site are the ones that I liked the most! I can wear their swimsuit as a regular clothing for me. Seriously! I loved them since I saw a picture in a model. I believe it was on Instagram, I can’t remember but the image stuck to my mind so I had to find out what that was all about. I didn’t know it was a swimsuit then and that’s how I found out about how LYRA was created. Create! This is an amazing word isn’t it? Reminds me that we co-create our reality and this woman who created Lyra is an extraordinary woman, like so many women out there striving to thrive!

LYRA was created through one woman’s struggle to find swimwear that suited her lifestyle. As someone who dressed modestly, and also loved the outdoors, swimming and keeping fit, it intertwined with a keen eye for fashion, swimwear that incorporated all these things was impossible to find, so she decided to design her own“, that’s what I read on their website when I did my research.

You can check out their about page and find out more about her and how exactly LYRA was created at

Back to me and my friend. When we were walking back to our cars I saw the girl coming in our direction but she was very close so by the time I got my phone out to take a picture of her feet it was too late, she had passed us again but I turned around and snap a picture of her from the back. My friend said that people would think that I was a pervert or something like that, I can’t remember the word she used but I reminded her that people can think whatever they want. I always say that I don’t care about what people think about me and I really don’t. Whatever people think, it’s probably not my reality… It’s not reality and I showed her the picture I had taken from the girl and she smiled and said: “You are so write!” to which I replied: “I’m always right!” and we laughed because that what friends do. They laugh together!

Below are the pieces I liked the most! Kaftans, Swim Top and Beach Trousers! I’ll leave a short description of them which are in their website. They are beautiful modest swimsuits. I can see myself walking wearing those pieces on a beautiful beach or on a cruise, or anywhere I want because I can! Check them out and let me know what you think!

Cheers, Isabel Canzoneri

SANA Kaftan – Elegant double-breasted batwing kaftan dress cut with a loose fit.

MAYA Kaftan – Long shirtdress made from a light cotton fabric to create a clean and minimalist silhouette.

Inspired by surf suits, the SOFIA swimsuit offers a feminine edge, functional design and flattering fit. The full swimsuit option includes all 4 pieces: Swim-top: fitted bodysuit with front zip and contrast aztec print; Swim leggings: ankle length swim leggings with an elasticated mid waist fit; Skirt: detachable swim skirt for optional added coverage and Swim cap: fitted chic swim turban, with ruche detailing

Halima Swim Top – Sleek long-sleeve modest bodysuit swimtop, with a flattering wrap design and side ruching detail. Includes crotch fastening, for secure easy wear

Beach Trousers – Stripe

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A Blondy Stole My Heart…

When I first saw her I immediately fell in love! I was fascinated by her. She was wild! Her uniqueness. She stood out in the crowd. Her beauty. Her elegance. I admired her a lot. She used to live behind my place and when I moved out from where I lived, I still saw her around almost every day. Then, a year later she met a partner, which I believe, she must have fallen in love with and it didn’t take long for her to move to another house with him, her partner, her love. For my surprise, they moved across street from where I was now living and I was happy as I could see her more often. I could see her from my kitchen window everyday when she left the house in the morning when I was preparing breakfast and when she came back in the afternoon. Sometimes, because I work from home, I’d see her during the day too. I always said hi to her when I saw her and I have to say that I believe she saw me as a friend, or so I wished. I was still in love with her and I knew I would always be. Time goes by so fast and it’s been almost three years, perhaps over three years, I’m not sure.

Sometimes I would sit outside on the weekends just to watch her playing with her family and friends. I just watched, like a voyeur… I wish I could play with them… so I could be close to her. It was beautiful to see the way she protected the little ones… yes, she had babies and that didn’t change my feeling for her. It’s probably crazy to say that I loved their kids too. They were an extension of her… I couldn’t explain. I was happy for her… for her family. Love is love right? I was just so happy to see her every day. I looked forward to it every single day. She stole my heart!

Today my heart is broken into pieces because of her. It hurts to know that I won’t ever see her again. Just like that, she is gone, hit by a car and I feel so angry. Angry with people driving like maniacs. Angry because I couldn’t protect her. Angry because my little love is gone. My Blondy! My Little Blondy! My Little Blondy is gone and I’ll miss her dearly. Her little babies can’t understand what happened to their momma and I just hope they will be okay. R.I.P. my little Blondy… I always loved you and always will…

This is a post filled with love and pain… for my little Blondy…

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Sometimes I do Crazy Things… But I’m Very Lucky!

Guys, as you know I spent a week in Colorado last week. You can read the blog here!

Well, while I was there, my phone decided that it was not going to work. Call it limited internet, memory full, or whatever. I call it sabotage! And I’ll tell you why.

I had a zoom meeting/training on Wednesday and I had told the people I was meeting before hand that I would be in the mountains in Colorado and I didn’t know how the internet connection would be and I’m so glad I did that because I was not able to participate due to internet connection. In a way this was a blessing in disguise. When you travel, you have to disconnect and I love to disconnect completely when I’m on vacation… well, but this was not really a vacation, was it?

Well, what I really wanted to talk about is that I traveled without telling my bosses! I packed and just left. So, no, that was no a vacation and I’m such a lucky girl… and have always been! Nothing happened while I was gone, but it could have been a disaster and worst, I would have to tell my bosses that I was out of town and that would not look good for me.

I was receiving text messages when we arrived there and sure enough one of the residents texted me about a roof leak… the units I manage have flat roofs from time to time we have an occasional leak, even though we maintain them every year. Anyways, so I replied to her message and texted my handyman asking him to go check it out… I haven’t heard from her and he texted me back saying that there was no one home. He had the key of my house and I knew if he needed he would go in and get keys of the units in any emergency… but communication got really bad as I was not able to text or email or call or anything… I could take pictures though… so at least I could snap some pictures of my adventure! Geez. I kept trying to send messages to him and to her and it would not go. When I went back to the hotel at the end of the day, I was able to send an email from my laptop and I told her what happened and gave her his number and she replied that he stopped by and was scheduling a time to fix. After that, on Tuesday, even my emails from my laptop were not working.

My point here is that I’m so lucky that nothing happened at work while I was gone and that next time I will have a back up plan in case that ever happen again. Shiiiii, don’t tell my boss!

Have you ever done something like that and had a problem because of your thirsty for adventure?

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The Healing Road!

Hi guys!

Hope you are having a great weekend. I have been super busy lately with not one, not two, but three houses to rent! That’s what happens when you work in Real Estate, but it’s all good!

In the middle of all this, remember my incident in January? I wrote about a ski accident here! That was unfortunate, as I had just learned to ski and was in love. I was skiing in Truckee at Sugar Bowl with my husband, the culprit!

As soon as I got home, I went to the doctor because my knee was really hurting. It turns out I had a tear 2 ACL. Now that I was not expecting and I’m still doing physical therapy and I’m just happy I possibly didn’t need surgery. I say possibly, because that’s not set in stone yet, but I have faith that I won’t need that. Anyways, long story short, my husband scheduled another ski trip, this time to Winter Park, Colorado.

I’ve been to Colorado in 2004 and for those who knew me then, know that my trip didn’t end up well but today I say that it was a blessing in disguise! I didn’t ski then and I never thought that after 18 years I would be back to that same location and have so much fun with my new love again, AKA, ski!

We wanted to stay at Zephyr Mountain Lodge because you can basically get out of the hotel and just take a few steps to the gondola and a few yards from the chair lift, but they didn’t have availability for the dates we wanted, so we stayed at Winter Park Mountain Lodge, which was across street from the ski area and they have a free, and very short shuttle trip to the ski resort with the green line, that runs all day until 5:30 pm, so that was really convenient as we decided not to rent a car. WPML is an old lodge and it reflects in the bedroom, at least ours. The carpet was old, the bed was comfortable and a great view of the mountain. Because it it is an old hotel, the bathroom didn’t have a fan so you could see a bit of mold in a corner of the ceiling above the shower. We loved Ben, the kid that was there when we arrived. He greeted us very enthusiastically. Such an upbeat and very helpful kid. If he was our kid, we would be very proud parents. Breakfast consisted with scrambled eggs, bacon and I believe turkey patties, yogurt, milk, muffins, coffee, tea, fruit juices from the machine. The restaurant doesn’t open Monday and Tuesday so the first day we ate at Goodies Mountain Creperie and we both had Turkey Avocado Wrap, mine without meat, which was very good. Unfortunately they didn’t have crepes the day we went. Then we had a very delicious pizza at Pizza Pedal’r, so good guys! Both places were Ben’s recommendation. I have to share the pizza’s name and ingredients: Mo garlic infused olive oil base, fresh basil, fresh mozzarella and fresh tomatoes. Check out their menu! The kid who was making the dough was really good, tossing around the dough. We had a beer to accompany the pizza. The third night we ate at the Lodge and it was really good food too, plus the staff was great. I would totally stay there again but I would like to try Zephyr too. Will explore around.

Steve arranged for a transfer from the airport instead of renting a car and that was a great choice. We didn’t intend to leave the resort and venture around anyways. When we arrived at the resort, it was not snowing and we went to rent our equipment and just a few steps away we arrived at the base and when I looked up, I freaked out! Seriously, the run was so vertically high and I thought “how the hell am I going to ski this shit?” My brain and my knee started to communicate and my knee, obviously, was in agreement with my brain and hell, I was too! I told my husband that there was no way I could ski in that place and he told me he would get me an instructor and I would be fine. I didn’t want to spend money on a one on one instructor and I agreed to a group class and the next day, there we went… . I had my knee brace on of course. I was a bit nervous because I could screw my knee again so I told the instructor about my incident and she said I would be fine and if I had any problem to talk to her immediately. It was only me and two other people and we chatted a bit and off we went to the chair. Hell, we got to the top and I looked down… it was high guys… it was not like the runs I had skied in Sugar Bowl! So we went on a few runs and all was well and she thought we were good enough to go higher! “What?” There goes my brain and my knee freaking out again, but there we went!

The chair lift kept going, and going, and going and took forever to get to the top! One thing I loved about Winter Park is that my feet hit the ground nicely and I mentioned it to the instructor that and she said that they did it that way because of the kids! So, short people like me, have not to worry! YAY, huge bonus!

If you read my first blog about my knee injury, you will learn that the cause of my fall, besides my husband was a freaking 3 year old kid so I was terrified by kids skiing around or in front of me. Well, if you know me you know that I believe that we attract to us the good and the bad with our thoughts… so whenever I saw a kid my brain would immediately take me to the day I fell at Sugar Bowl… and although I didn’t want to hit the kid, I was taken directly towards the little bastard. Maybe, unconsciously I wanted revenge. As I headed directly to strike the kid, my brain was screaming Fog, fog, fog and I could hear the ski instructor who was right behind me, say “put your eight in your left feet and point your toe to your right side… look to your right and you will go there.” Although I knew what I had to do, I couldn’t do it and guys, it was terrifying… I finally looked away from the kid and pointed my toe to my right… It was so close guys, I probably missed the freaking kid by an inch or two and off I went back on track and down the hill. That was my first almost incident.

I was practicing my turns with the instructor… the other two were more advanced skiers so she stayed with me most of the time and we were going on freaking high runs… we got to a part of the hill that my mind could not, in no way, let me venture and my legs stopped me by making me fall. My body was afraid of me, I guess… so she send the two down the hill and we went to the easiest way… and I’m not ashamed to say that. But remember, the easiest way in Colorado is not the same as Sugar Bowl! That was the first day we skied. My husband was practicing his sharp turns and stops on the blue and black runs!

The second day I was alone with Steve… The poor guy, instead of going do his thing, he chose to stay with me, which in a way, I was grateful for and at the same time I was a bit frustrated because he would ski in front of me and guys, I need space to feel safe. At some point I was skiing so close to him that I freaked out as we got to a huge slope and I fell… he helped me to get up as this time he was behind me. I felt like I was holding him back and I felt bad about it but I kept asking him to go and he didn’t want to leave me so I asked him to please go in front of me but faster so I could feel safer… I’m not so sure why I was so scared…

We kept skiing and again we ended up on a huge slope and again, my body wanted to feel safe and it knew that if I went down that slope I would probably hit a bunch of people… as when I get scared instead of going on the other direction away from people and obstacles, I tend go straight to them… it didn’t happen, because I fell again but I’m sure it would. Our imagination is something out of this world! Watch out!! Be aware of it and control it, because you can! It’s all in your mind… and I’m saying this to myself guys but feel free to take the advice!

As I was down, I looked up to see if I was on someone’s way, I saw a young woman skiing towards me. “Oh fog, she is going to hit me and fall too.” I thought, but there was nothing I could do because I was down on a very steep slope ahead of me and I couldn’t get up… I have no idea how she went around me, because she too, was freaking out about that slope and was coming down on a big wedge… her boyfriend, fiancé or husband, whoever that guy was to her, passed by and did a fast turn around me extending his hand to me. He was gorgeous guys! Oops, I guess I should not say that, right? Whatever, the guy was tall and handsome, what can I do? Lie to you? or worse, to me?! Nah! Anyway, his partner was a bit down the hill with my husband and they were both watching us. That was a funny scene! I will write it on my next book, let me make a note of that. Anyway, I was passing my poles from hand to hand, all confused (every time I find myself in a difficult or embarrassed situation I tend to become very confused, it is so funny) of what to do with the poles and he said he could hold them for me and I wanted to be helpful so I grabbed both poles on my right hand, stuck them in the snow and hold them firm to help me help him to help me to stand (did I get you confused with that sentence?) and grabbed his hand with the other hand. He pulled me up… kinda… because it was hard to get up… but he held my hand very firm and said, “it’s okay, I got you, come straight up.” but it was so hard. I was in a very awkward position, holding on to him, kinda pulling him down and holing the poles trying to pull myself up… but up I went! I thanked him profusely and he went back to his partner. My husband thanked him too when he reached them. You know, there’s one thing that I have to say about skiers: They are a bunch of amazing helpful and kind of people! I’m so grateful! My husband and I went down on the easier way to the village and the couple went down that huge slope. One day I’ll be confident enough with my skills to go down that route, but not so soon.

Anyway, I survived guys! I came back home in one piece!! And I can’t wait to go back… to any place with snow that I can ski… but that’s not going to happen until my knee is completely healed! And for that, I have to thank my doctors and especially Katie and her team from PRN Carlsbad.

Until my next adventure guys! You can see some pictures of the trip on Instagram @belcanzoneri.

Cheers and stay safe.

Isabel Canzoneri

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